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But what is the essence of meditation? Is awareness. And do you know awareness? How many of you think you have awareness? Raise your hand. Okay. And how many of you think you don’t have awareness? This is why you come here to learn awareness. I don’t have awareness, so I need awareness, so I come here to learn awareness. This is good. That means you all have awareness. That proves that you all have awareness. How? Those people who say I have awareness, of course you have awareness. You are aware of, you are aware that you have awareness. This is why you are raising hand. And those people who say I don’t have awareness that means you have awareness. Because you are aware that I don’t have awareness. So without awareness you cannot raise your hand. This is why I think we all have awareness. This is why in buddhism meditation here, the buddhism meditation is not like we are teaching you something completely different which is you don’t have at all before and come to here to join the class and you will immediately transform and you totally become different person than before. It is not like that. And it is like you are recognizing who you are. What we call gom. Meditation means gom, in Tibetan what we call gom. Gom means meditation. So the meaning of gom is getting familiar with. You are getting familiar with your mind, yourself. So we all have lot of good things.
As I introduce you we all have awareness. So we all have awareness. Not only that, we all have love and compassion, we all have wisdom, we all have clarity. We all have capability, power, many things. Sometimes some scientist say if you have ten qualities within you nine of them is positive and one of them is negative. Then what you see is only negative. So you see only negative, you don’t see nine good things within you. So you only see one bad thing within you and exaggerate. Not just seeing bad things, exaggerate you know. Make it like hundred percent. And sometime I give example about that. Maybe I will give you example. How we exaggerate problem, how the monkey mind exaggerating problem. As I mentioned before about monkey mind, bala bala bala yare yare, like this, always talking talking talking. Monkey mind sometimes two, three having discussion. And some monkey mind says: Pizza is good. And another monkey mind says: Oh I don’t like pizza. And other monkey says: Oh pizza is good you know, I like pizza. And third monkey mind judging. See pizza is good or no good. Making some kind of, how to say, comment. Even you go outside, after you finished this talk, you walk alone, you think you are alone but actually you are not alone. Many of them having conversation inside your head, bala bala bala yare yare. That is what I call monkey mind. This is why there is a verbal, image and physical sensation, feeling, emotion, all this are monkey mind. And monkey mind normally is very very busy. Very active, love job. Active active. If you don’t have job, that means normally monkey mind makes problem. The job is like problem. So if you don’t have big problem then monkey mind thinks I am becoming jobless. I should make one, otherwise soon I might become homeless. So I don’t want to become homeless, I should make problem. And then looking for problems. If you don’t have big problem in your life then monkey mind tries to make small problem as big problem. Then after that monkey mind will be very happy. But if you have big problem in your life, then small problem is small problem for you. Not big problem. But if you don’t have big problem then small problem is big problem for you, because monkey mind is making big problem.
One time I have one friend and she is always complaining about her life. Oh my life is terrible, miserable. There is no meaning, life has no meaning, life has no meaning. What is meaning of life. Actually she has very good job, good family, her health is good. Looks like fantastic, her life is good. But she always complains and unfortunately one day she got accident. You know accident, crush. And broke her leg. And she has to go to hospital and stay there and they put cast. And she has to wear this cast for six month. And after six month later she totally recover. She is become same as before. And she came to me and she said: Life is wonderful. Why? Because her broken leg, she broke her leg, the monkey mind concentrated with the leg. Because the monkey mind happy, got very nice job. And making job, oh no good, oh bala bala yare yare. And let go of the small problem. This is why the only problem her life is broken leg. But good news is, after six month later, totally recover, the leg becomes very good. And the monkey mind have little holiday, break. And during break time she come to me. Important is if you know how your mind is making problem then that is what we call wisdom. Wisdom. That is the gateway of the liberation. Freedom, liberation is through wisdom. And wisdom, which is you know how your mind working. What is the experience of your mind. What is the perception of your mind. And how your mind is functioning. How your mind is making problem, solution, whatever. That is the wisdom.
Okay now I will tell you another one is, if you don’t have big problem, how your monkey mind making small problem as big problem. Okay. And for that, you have option, you have to choose. Option one with face, one with belly. So you want to use belly as example, or face as example? Face raise your hand. Belly raise your hand. Oh more belly here. So now belly win. Okay. If you don’t have big problem in your life, your life pretty okay, your monkey mind begin to search job. Looking for job. Where is problem? How about my belly? I am okay or not, see. Look at the mirror. There is some kind of like TV screen on the side they see me, my belly. Then you might think: Oh dear, my belly is pretty big. This is a bad news. What should I do. And then monkey mind, that time monkey mind having interview. Job interview. And soon will accept. If you don’t have awareness, if you don’t have wisdom, then it will accept. And then – like science says, I am also sometime lot of discussion with scientist, neuroscientists. What they say is, in your brain there are a lot of neurons. What I call gossiping neurons. They love gossip. Bala bala bala yare yare you know. And then some of the neurons communicating each other. Hey your belly is big. Then other neuron says: Yes your belly is big. Big belly, big belly, big belly. And then they make group. Kind of like political group. And they all talking about big belly, big belly, big belly. How ugly you are? Oh your belly big. And as this group become bigger and bigger then for you it looks like you are becoming more and more ugly. This is why next week when you look at the mirror you are becoming much uglier than last week. Actually you are same maybe you become better than last week, maybe you did little bit exercise. Maybe eating less. But then when you look at the mirror again next month, you are much much uglier than last month. And then after few month later you feel very very bad about yourself. You feel you are very ugly. And at the same time, if you think oh big belly, if you can do more exercise, more diet it is good. But you cannot do that also. You just suffer that i am ugly, at the same time you don’t have courage, you don’t have some kind of like confidence that you can change yourself. You are almost trapped there. And maybe you have five percent is problem, but ninety five percent you exaggerated. It is not real, monkey mind exaggerated. And you cannot walk in front of us, you think she is locking at my big belly. He is looking at my big belly. Now everybody looking at my big belly. And sometime you research i think not everybody looking at my big belly. I think that is not true. And you research. And the result of research, say yes. Everybody looking at your big belly. So you got wrong result. Then your perception become so stabile, solid. Become like rock. And then almost become like circle, you behave as you are ugly and looser, something like that.
Then how to break this, how to liberate that. And important, first important is, to see this, to realize this. This is why one of the meaning of meditation getting familiar with your mind, this is why you have to get familiar with your mind. How does my mind work. So your mind making problem. So if you see this, this is the wisdom.